I remember when I was young and everybody in my hood hated me. Even the older people. I would ask my self what did I do wrong, I hated being me and I would cry everyday when I try to be nice to everyone while they treat me like shit. Until I grow up…
Time doesn’t heal wounds, it only makes you wiser. When I got older I realise there’s nothing wrong with me. People only like you when they can benefit from you and most will hate you for just being yourself. So in that moment i tried so hard to make people love me, yes, I became less me and everything they wanted me from me.
You can’t please a human being no matter how hard you try. I did everything they would ask of me, I would give or buy things for them in order to be accepted. I acted as a fool to make them laugh n keep them happy. I lost my self, hoping I would find a human that would love and be there for me.
I seek friends more than anything. I was always there for everybody. I was kind and forgiving even when they treated me like trash. None of the things I did for everyone made just one human to appreciate me. No body bothered to even say thanks Kitty for making me smile. I would cheer those who were in pain but drown at night on my own.
I felt empty around a bunch of people, I would feel sad even when they are entertaining. I’d come home and look in a mirror after removing my mask😊 and I would ask myself,‘ What are you doing Kitty?’… why do I let people walk all over me? It’s clear they don’t like me.
Growth is important in life cause it allows one to see things clearly. And that’s when I opened my eyes and realised, people are the reason for my sadness my pain. I stopped pleasing humans. I stopped being a fool and losing my soul to them and guess what??…..
My life became easier as it got better. Spend time alone and spoiling my self, talking me and that made me free. You don’t need anyone but yourself. Don’t change yourself for any soul, if they love you, they should love you for who you are. I was able to accomplish a lot of things on my own. And since then I never shed a tear but made my dreams come true…
I gained back myself, I am me and I am alone but trust me I am so happy.